the parkals are in the post

With a hemorrhaging [who would have thought that's how you spell it, thanks dictionary.com] brain from the onslaught of debilitating procrastination I was entranced by a beacon flashing at me when trying to check my emails on the new yahoo [which i am not loving one little bit...if I could be bothered switching I would - yeah Yahoo you got me by the clangers I am staying not because I am loyal to you but because I just can't be arsed telling all my friends we are not together anymore]
Check Your Stress Levels it was telling me
So I listened
Going through the mundane click and continue routine, I figured I was sailing through with flying colors, feeling sorry for the bastards that were in the mess some of the questions were suggesting. Here I am, on vacation soon to go on a very big vacation, no break ups, no job losses, no deaths or mortgage repayments, no illnesses or physical ailments, la la la...cocky locky I was!
Till this hit me of course...

High level stress?
Where?
Take action now it told me...
Seek therapy...
Evaluate how you prioritize your time...
Initially the cockiness was shocked right out of me, then it turned to dismay and a little disgruntlement - who did Yahoo think they were telling ME I had high stress levels.
Not one to ignore advice, I did a quick scan of the room to evaluate any stressful factors...packing? ahhh do it tomorrow! bills? They'll get paid! Mess? Someone will clean it! Lack of chocolate in arms reach? I'll have to get up sooner or later!
And then I landed on them...4 big yellow parcels. Instantly I knew what I had to face and where any stress I was feeling was emanating from...
POST OFFICE PHOBIA
I have it good, I have it bad!
It has taken me a good 4 days [actually thats a bit of a fib...Mum has been waiting since January for her present - 4 days give or take six months] to pack these parcels, write the addresses and stack them neatly in the corner.
Swallowing hard, I packed them into a Coles bag and away I went...stopped in my tracks I realised my Japanese is so crap I could never pull this off alone without the help of my Year 12 drama training. Ripping my shoes off, I ran through the house clawing at boxes and cupbords in search of a Japanese dictionary.
That was no use, throwing it to the ground I angrily mumbled to myself while leaving the house, parcels in tow 'Well it"s a little late now isn't it...shoulda thought of this long before now...how long have you been in this country and you still don't know how to say you want to send something to Australia...mumble mumble moan moan'
Of course what I thought would be a simple "Hello, I would like to send these to Australia" Followed by a smile, a bow and a "Why certainly mam here let me take them from your clutches and send them on their way"; turned into me slapping the parcels on the counter, the man looking at me oddly, me blurting out "Australia" in my best Japanese accent, then recieving a long winded explaination of the various services of the postal system...i think... the only 3 words I understood was airplane, EMS and mitsu - which I thought meant 3...but I looked around and couldn't see three of anything.
As the rest of the office staff began to immerge from there nooks and crannys, nose around, reply with "Osutoraria ah soo" and then dart back into their holes, I felt my body temp on the rise, my acting skills on standby and my intense need to flee the scene intensify.
After much ado about seemingly nothing, a spalsh of english, a dash of japanese, a dollop of sign language, endless forms, and serious checking it seems the parcels are in the post.
My yearly post office visit is over, I have decided when I leave the country I leave with nothing if it means I can avoid going anywhere near a yubinkyoku [see i know the word for post office, good lot of help that is...]